it's been a long journey...a part of which ended thursday afternoon...

it started with chris meeting a little boy as he set up our youth center. when the youth center opened that little boy showed up with his brother, and later his mom...

his mom named naraa.

over the next 2 years or so we got to know and love naraa. she had fought and won the battle against breast cancer, she was a strong woman who knew what she wanted out of life. we wondered what amazing things the Lord could do through her if she would give her life to Him. eventually our conversations led to "religion" and spiritual things, and though she made it clear she had no need for our Jesus, she was ok learning about Him through us.

last fall we got the news that her cancer had returned. it was stronger this time, more obviously devastating to her every-day life. we watched as a once unstoppable woman became more and more ravaged by the disease. we sat with her, cried with her, and shared our faith with her as she faced this terrifying battle. still she clung to her shaman, he was all she had, our Jesus was out of reach...our heritage not hers.

we continued to pray, thousands around the globe lifted her name heaven-ward. i told her once how famous she had become in america, and she smiled...but still, crippled by fear, pressured by her family and controlled by her shaman, she refused to reach out and take the eternal peace Christ offered. as she continued to deteriorate, her family talked of the promise of healing from her shaman, and continued to pour money into his visits.

most of the time when we visited she lay moaning in pain, unable to talk, her only words to us: "please, i don't want to die!"....

it was devastating. hadn't God called us here for times such as this?...to share His truth and see it bring hope to lives just like naraa's? was THIS how it was to end?

the last time we saw her, she lay under a time-chart displaying what positions she should be lain in, and when, in order to avoid bedsores. she was deep in a drug-induced sleep. she had spent the last two weeks in a "Jesus hospital" (as they called it). one that shares the gospel with all its patients. her family scoffingly told us since coming she had begun "praying to Jesus"...we didn't know what to think...was she simply doing what she thought she had to to be healed?...was she just following "dr's orders". and yet she had been so vehement in the past that, though she loved us, she could have no part in our Savior.

she was to go home the next day, her allotted time at the hospital had ended and we offered to transport her. we went in to meet with her and she was awake and talking for the first time in a long time. a gift...

with her eyesight gone and hearing going it took her a little bit to recognize who we were. and once she did her tone became lighter as she told us "I've started praying to Jesus! i told him to take my sin and sickness! everyone asks me if i honestly believe what i'm saying and i tell them why would i lie about something like this? isn't it wonderful?" we wanted to rejoice with her, but also wanted a clearer understanding of just what had happened in her heart. did she really understand?...our time with her had been so short, her understanding of the gospel so limited and clouded by her worldview. her mind was in and out and her pain medication took her away from us before we could really talk with her, but as we drove away from her home we had hope...she had heard the gospel once again and responded in some way.

that was two weeks ago, and thursday she passed on. this side of eternity we will never know what truly happened in her heart, but the Lord understands better than we ever could.

it's always been out of our hands...and, as always, we simply trust, it's all we can do. as humans we would love for everything to be concrete and tangible, but the truth is, as believers, we are dealing with all things abstract and INtangible. that's the point. it's not about us and our ways and our thoughts anymore, it's about something so much bigger than those...who can know the mind of God?...who can understand His ways?....

we are still left wondering what great things the Lord will do through naraa's life, and her death. one chapter is completed but the story continues...and nothing really makes sense until the final page, right? we are praying for opportunities to influence the family, especially her two boys. we leave the country in two days, which is difficult, knowing that now more than ever they need the hope of God's truth and His word, and have no one else in their lives to share it. when we went to their house today, there was a buddhist priest chanting endlessly in their ger (it's been a three-day ordeal)...as we looked at their faces we knew...they are without hope, without peace in the death of their daughter, mother, sister...

the story continues...

Lord show them your peace and your hope, continue to write the story, bring in new characters to share with them in our place...give us faith that for what little we see of it...this is your masterpiece...and it will all come out right in the end...