not long ago i was talking consequences with my eight-year-old for her attitude. with tear-filled eyes she looked at me in anger and said, 'it's not fair!'
i had to laugh at the irony of her statement (though i refrained from doing so audibly...100 parenting points...scored)...
her situation was the very essence of fairness...the law of sowing and reaping at its finest. she was receiving the fruit of her actions, and what she really meant was, 'i'm not happy!'
somewhere in her little mind the two have become synonymous...happiness and fairness. when she's not happy...life is completely unfair...and i am obviously a horribly, oppressively, unforgivably mean person who cares nothing for her at all! hmphh!
i took a step back, and in those angry tears i saw a reflection...because somewhere along the way...well...maybe i've equated the two as well.
i don't want to!
it's too hard!
but GooOOoOOOddd!
and with a little stomp of the foot (just for effect) i huff:
it's.not.fair!....
hmphh!
yes...as i walk through the department store of life with Jesus...sometimes i am the tantrum-throwing toddler (spiritually speaking...of course) and He the ever-patient parent...waiting for me to get a grip...and think about things rationally for crying out loud!
not fair? seriously? let's talk about not fair...
let's talk about grace, redeeming a soul...lost of its own wandering...
...perfection becoming my mess...
let's talk about love, pursuing a heart that could never fully reciprocate...
....tiny gifts...never measuring up to all He is...
...and never having to...
let's talk about mercies, new with .every.sunrise...
...no matter how countless the nights spent questioning...
let's talk about thoughts innumerable toward one so quick to distraction...
...willing heart...weak flesh...
let's talk about records of wrongs...destroyed...gone forever...
...shredded and thrown to the wind...
...a watergate scandal of eternal proportions!
i was so right! nothing about this life i live is fair...in Christ i've exchanged all i deserve for more than i could possibly think or imagine.
so when i'm tempted to clench my fists and grumble of unhappiness...(and there is plenty of it in this broken place we journey)...may i instead get over myself and never stop praising God for...
or leading others to...
this life of utter unfairness.
